Sunny But Cold

Today is a beautiful day. It is sunny outside. The sun has been quite absent over the last few months around here. I normally don't notice things like that, but I did the other day. I normally don't get annoyed with the snow because I love the 4 seasons of Michigan. Yet, the other day when it was snowing again all I could think was, "when is spring coming?"

That seems to be a theme in my life right now, the idea of waiting. I'm on the edge of the spring and the new, but not yet. Some of you know that I was away from life for a few weeks this month. I went to the hills of East Tennessee to crank out the first draft of my thesis. It was a long, hellish two weeks being squirreled away from my family in a 6' by 6' space for 10 to 12 hours a day. I did make it through the writing process and my first draft was completed. That's about the most you can say about it. It was horrible writing in my opinion. Dr. Norris, my thesis adviser, confirmed that the other day with an email saying it was miserable and with his pen marks all over the paper copy he returned to me. So, while I'm closer to being done with my degree, I'm still not yet there, and there is a lot of work yet to do. Plus, I have so many books on the to read list like Lord of the Rings that I cannot get to right now because of the thesis work and focus.

It's the same way in my ministry. When I came to South Lansing Christian Church I knew that I would do a dual ministry in worship and youth for awhile. When I think back, two years sticks in my head as the estimated time frame. It has been four years now and there is no hope of a change anytime soon. Not that I don't enjoy my job. I love my job and the things that I get to do. It is just that I sometimes feel spread so thin in the areas that I lead that I cannot make good progress in either one.

My family life also has the same challenges. Steph and I have had the priviledge of living in the farmhouse on South's property since we moved here in 2001. It has been a blessing for us. Yet, we are at the point where we want a place that is our own. We have ideas and dreams of what we want in a house, how far we want to be away from the church, and such. But, with the comotion of the thesis the last few months, winter colds and the stomach flu in Januray, and keeping up with ministry, we have only had the time to dream.

So, as the day outside is beautiful and sunny, the cold of winter is still present. Snow covers the the dormant brown of earth and new life waits behind the curtain for another day. As Christians we are in the same place. Our Lord and Savior has come and gone. He has showed us the way, the truth, and the life. We eagerly wait for his return. Yet, as with my thesis, my ministry, and the desire for a house of our own, we must move forward with life now while we wait. We must live out the way, the truth, and the life with our faith and actions in this world as we wait for Christ's return. (John 14:1-21)

An Outdoor Interruption

I have been away from my family now for 10 days. It has been a long ten days where my focus has been on finishing my thesis. That has gone ok, though I unfortunately am no where close to being done with it. It just takes too long to get into my data and get my brain out of "not thesis writing" mode.

I have been in the library or reading and working on this thesis pretty much nonstop. At best, I have had some mental breaks in the evenings when I go to my friend divides house, where I am staying. Today the library was only open from 9am to 4pm. This really sucks in my case because I get the best work done when I'm in the library. So, at 4pm I got kicked out. I've been working at such a crazy pace that I decided to take a break and go for a drive.

I enjoy driving through the hills of Tennessee. It is always a joy to drive and look at all the different styles of houses and see the countryside. Sometimes it is a bit scary when you drive into a "deliverance" type area. There were none of those experiences today, thank goodness. So I drove, with the window down, since it was warm.

On my journey I ended up at Watagua Lake. It is a big inland lake stuck between a couple of mountains. It is very beautiful and very peaceful, except for a bit of road noise. So, along the way I pulled off the road and sat by the side of the lake. It was heavenly . . .

As I sat there and stared across the lake wondering about life, my thesis, and being away from my wife and daughter, I began to hear a rumbling in the distance. I looked to the left and saw a houseboat. I thought, that would be fun and cool. Out on the water for a couple of days at a time, just floating and taking in everything. I think that would be grand. Because of those thoughts I was not to distracted by the rumbling of the motor, which was loud for a boat.

After awhile they stopped. I could hear a couple of voices in the distance, but it was not bad at all. Then the music started. Picture the most peaceful waterfront you can picture with a tranquil hush coming from all over. Then jar that image and calm with some good old country music! And to add to the heinousness of their "crime", I could hearing one of the guys singing loudly in a drunken tone.

Needless to say, I quickly left my peacefulness and headed to the car. So much for spending some quiet time with nature. . . $%@! rednecks!

Windows And 2nd Grade

Being far away from home is a difficult thing. It's hard for me to stay focused sometimes because of the amount of distractions around me. I left home a couple of days ago to come to Tennessee so I could work on my thesis. It is a good thing that I am not at home or in the office at church. There it is too easy to go home and play with my daughter. It is too easy to get side tracked by other things in the office like my guitar or some sort of ministry work. Plus, the phone is there.

Away from home there are other distractions. When you return back to a place that you have lived before, you want to go around and see how everything has changed. You also want to return to the places that you loved while you were there. It was hard for me not to drive into the mountains yesterday and walk back the Appalachian Trail to Laurel Falls. If I would have had a little more daylight and no thesis to write, I would have been there, walking beside the river taking in the beauty of God's creation.

I think the most challenging thing for me is just staying focused because I'm away from everyone who would help to keep me focused. It's too easy to think that I need to go get some food and take a break or that I need to check on the weather on the tv for a moment. My biggest distraction yesterday were two squirrels outside of the window in my thesis carrel. They were small gray squirrels feasting on the berries in the tree. They were energetic and interesting, and only 3 feet away from me. (I must have been hidden by a glare on the window).

Now, why in the world did I get a thesis carrel with a window. Don't they know that I sometimes struggle with daydreaming? It all started in 2nd grade. I was in Mrs. Barcus's class. She was a rather large, yet short woman with a mole the size of a quarter on her cheek. She was the quintesential 2nd grade teacher. I have a few memories from that year of school. I remember Mrs. Barcus teaching us "Zippity Do Da" that we used to sing to a 45rpm record. I also remember her getting out her accordian and playing it for us. I also remember an African American girl who was in our class who always talked. Always! She got paddled a couple of times for it.

It was in that classroom that my problem with daydreaming started. They questioned it a little in 1st grade. I used to write multiple words down as I copied things off the board. An example would be, "See see spot run." They thought it was my sight and had me get my eyes checked. There were no problems. Then, in 2nd grade, one of the 9 weeks grading periods came to a close. Mrs. Barcus was concerned that I had not really turned in any of the papers that she had given us to do. When she checked my desk, she found them all nicely and neatly stacked in my desk, partially completed. You see, when she would hand things out, I would do part of them, but then get stuck looking out the window daydreaming. The sad thing is that there was nothing really mesmerizing outside of the window--just a couple roofs of the nearby houses. The following weeks were not good weeks for me. I would go home, work on the undone papers, eat dinner, work on the undone papers, and then go to bed. I probably also got spanked at home, though I don't really remember that far back.

I guess what I need today is Mrs. Barcus keeping me focused to do my work, along with my mom. I won't be in the thesis carrel today; the library is closed. There will be no looking out the window at the hotel either, because the curtain is closed. The tv is there. That is a slight problem. The bigger problem is just me getting focused and doing work.

Stuck At the Airport

Being stuck in an airport is an interesting thing. There are so many different people all around. Everyone is heading from one place to another with one purpose or another helping them to get from point A to point B. They come in all different shapes and sizes, colors, and however else one would use to describe how we are different from each other. Best of all you see mullets. I’ve seen two mullets so far. One was of the garden variety—just a little long in the back, to show off his connection to the 20s. Another one was a great long hockey mullet. Those are the best in my opinion—fans showing their true pride for a sport that at the moment doesn’t support its fans. Rather, owner and player are bickering about who should make the most money. Now, I might be showing my lack of money—I would assume that once one has achieved a certain amount of money, then getting more wouldn’t be a necessity. I guess I’m just a poor man trying to think in the ways of a rich man.

Back to being stuck—I've been here since 3pm. I entered the airport labyrinth at 11:45am this morning by having my bag and suitcase completely unpacked and searched. From there I went to the metal detector and was promptly pulled aside for more investigation. They clothed my shoes to make sure I wasn’t laced with a bomb and then finished it all off with a pat down. From there I went upstairs to be gouged by the snack bar. I paid $2 for a Styrofoam cup of ice with a little Coke poured over it. How to people not feel guilty working in those places?
Just wait, it gets better. After setting down to wait on my boarding call, I soon heard a sweet lady come over the loud speaker offering up the information that my flight had been delayed. It seems that security at the airport in Cincinnati allowed a security breach. That held up the plane that I was waiting on to fly to Cincinnati. Needless to say, I missed my connection in Cincinnati. So, now I'm stuck here in a plastic chair, slurping on a more moderate priced Coke, watching the people going to and fro, and listening to some Ricky Skaggs bluegrass music. (One must listen to bluegrass when they are in Kentucky. I know, I know, Cincinnati Airport in Kentucky is not logical. I didn't put it here!) Only an hour and a half more to wait. Yippee.