A Sorrowful God

Today I was reading in 1 Samuel about the life of Saul. Saul was a knucklehead. He never did anything right. All I can picture is this tall, gangly guy that is the odd duck of Israel. I think God was using his divine sarcasm here. "You want a king? I'll give you a king!" Then he quickly shouts to a couple of his angels, "Go find me the biggest goofball you can!!"

God chooses, whether reluctantly or not, to use Saul to lead his people since his people didn't get that he wanted to be their King. God sent his spirit onto Saul and empowered him. I think Saul would have been a great king. But, it seems that Saul begins to get in the way of what God is looking for and wanting. Saul messes with the order of things by doing his own sacrifices and not waiting for Samuel. He doesn't fully carry out God's orders in anialating the Amalekites. After that event, God becomes sorrowful that he has made Saul king. Eventually, God removes his spirit from Saul and moves on to David, son of Jesse.

This morning I had breakfast with a couple of ministry partners. We spent some time talking about the the church, our ministries, and the struggles that go along with serving the church. The conversation encouraged me to not be discouraged and as frustrated as I am.

Then I come back to my office for my devotions and I read 1 Samuel 15 about God being sorrowful for making Saul king. I wonder if God is ever sorrowful for the ministry that I've done. I wonder if he is sorrowful for the way his church exists. Are we being what he wants us to be? Has he removed his blessing away and moved on to someone else, another people better focused on being his people in the now? I don't think he has. But, I do think he has the urge to take us out behind the woodshed or to the bathroom for a proverbial beating to straighten us out. Why would he? I know I have the urge from time to time.

I need to find better ways to express myself and help the church be more like the church that God wants it to be. I need to be like my mother--stern, yet extremely loving, and not afraid to carry around a wooden spoon and beat me when I was out of line. May we live in ways that bring God joy and pride, not sorrow.